Half Banana Diet

If Blogging were around when I was young, I might have avoided some criticism for over sharing my life. At around age five, I was explaining my every action to my brother (who was a year younger) as we moved our toy trucks around in the dirt. Kevin rebuked me, “No one cares what you are doing with your truck.” He was so very precocious, warning me with brotherly love that I would make a fool of myself in first grade if I continued annoying everyone with running commentary on my mundane actions. But I was already too deep in the mire of a fool’s compulsion and continued to spew my muddled voiceprint everywhere I went. When I was grown, my Mother asked me at a vacation function to explain how I had lost weight. She was always complimenting me in a vain effort to make me look good. Ironically her good effort made me look vain. As I took a deep breath to begin my detailed accounting, my Dad interrupted with a tone reeking of annoyance, “Yeah, yeah, we all know how Geoff now slices only half a banana on his cereal rather than a whole one.” Clearly he had heard enough of this tale, although his characterization taken out of context unfairly trivialized a story that was loaded with more details and lively witticisms which were now going to go unheard. In my Blog, these stories can finally breathe. I visualize my Dad and Kevin up in heaven staring incredulously at each other. Kevin says, “Can you believe Geoff is writing about what he was doing with his toy cars in Kindergarten and publishing his half banana diet? What is going on down there on Planet Earth?”


21 thoughts on “Half Banana Diet

  1. That’s very true about mothers, whose indulgence can have negative consequences. LOL. I know a boy whose mother believes he’s another van Gogh and the family ends up spending a lot of money sending him to art programs, where he produces one childish thing after another. It takes years for the family to wake up to the reality.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. well it looks like you found an audience here for your stories…:

    sometimes I wish I had the gift of gab, but I’m on the other extreme, at least in person. I tend not to say much, and jut assume no one would be interested in what I have to say.

    Now blogging is another story, I don’t mind sharing, even though I still know that no one really cares what I have to say. After all, it is all blather…

    Liked by 2 people

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