I interviewed for a Gratitude Blog on WordPress but they assigned me to the Whinyland department. Even so, I am grateful every day I awake up alive, including last Monday at 12:36 am when I scribbled the words Ding Dang Dung in my bedside notebook. Apparently this quirky conjugation of unrelated words was hysterical in my dream. But I could not mold them into an amusing “ringy-dingy ring, rang, rung, sting, stang, stanged” post about the absurdity of the English language. Instead I will whine about what I have lost in the Age of Technology.
I miss walking into any drug store or grocery store to get my annual flu shot. Thanks Covid-19 for creating a reservation system. On Ding Dang Dung Monday, my wife labored on the computer reserving flu shots for that very day. Oops, the Confirmations say Monday, November 7th. I miss seeing doctors in person; the only one I want to visit on Zoom is my dentist.
I miss barber shop comradery. Now I need reservations on an app that notifies customers when to arrive. That is not convenient for a technology idiot like me. Luckily, I like long hair. Except in my soup.
I miss the airport where you could go out to dinner after Homecoming. Last weekend at the same facility, I was caught in massive gridlock because automated pay stations were down. I miss free parking or plugging a few coins in a meter.
I miss the aesthetics of old fashioned bookstores despite the efficiency of ordering books online. I used to surreptitiously plant my novel in the stores. Smuggling copies into Amazon Corporate Headquarters takes the fun out of that game. But I want my permanent electronic record to reflect that I am grateful about living to see the Future.
That dang Covid brang a lot of unwelcome changes, sadly.
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Somebody comes up with the idea of hijacking airplanes, the internet takes scams to a whole new level, and Covid-19 really sickens us.
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could not agree more. soon i may need an appointment to walk in the woods, but as i am at your skill level with tech, i may have to sneak in at night and that’s not ideal, as i also have bad night vision.
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But you will always have your sense of humor.
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no, it’s only for rent and by appointment only
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Already, one needs reservations to hike The Wave, Arches National Park and other popular “walk in the woods” areas.
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Reservations are everywhere now. I cannot take ferries spontaneously or find a parking spot at the airport without one. Logically, this puts order and convenience in the world. But to me, it feels like such an erosion of freedom of movement, even if that freedom was an illusion.
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There are many things that were simpler before the techaliens took over. But being grateful is one thing that should never change. The closer the digital world brings us, the further apart we grow in the physical world. Must be some weird equation…
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I should have paid more attention in Math class.
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I, too, am grateful that I wake up alive, but I am more grateful that someday I will WAKE UP ALIVE in my Father’s Home. That won’t be a bad day for me, but maybe for people to whom I owe money. π
β€οΈ&π, c.a.
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Come into life with a big inheritance and go out deeply in debt and you might win the battle but lose the war!
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As long as I donβt go with them owing me money! π
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My problem with bookstores is that I always see other stuff and wind up in a totally different place and nothing in the armload of stuff I bring home is the book my wife sent me for. Come to think of it that happens at the grocery store, too.
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That is why my wife never sends me to the grocery store.
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My wife won’t buy the stuff at the grocery store that she wants. When I go to Home Depot for some absurd honey-do widget I get the “Oh, and pick up something sweet while you’re out.”
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That was for Herb but I’m a WP retard, so… All of your ding dang dung things, the Professor showed one the other day with all the desert/dessert/desert etc junk. However, you reminded me of a t-shirt/poster from long ago that starred (as in appearing, not as in affixing a star) a picture of a mouse with = mousey. + A picture of Chairman mao = Tung. A picture of a small turd = Mousey Dung. Chicken in a car, car won’t go? What city are we in? Chica(r)go! Last but not least, humans weren’t made to tap glass to communicate. Pharmacists in Texas take walkins for flu shots, will even give you a Flu in one arm and a Covid in the other. The cocktail for pneumonia, shingles, covid and flu, as an elixir, is still under advisement.
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The pharmacist is always poised to give me multiple injections at the same time. Although people with way more medical knowledge than me say it is safe, I have a firm intuitive belief that getting a flu shot and a Covid vaccination at the same time is not a good idea for my particular body.
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I’ve been meaning to write to you about the Mariners – how exciting! It’s looking dire right now; maybe the players need to read your book. I was hoping for Seattle-Philly World Series, or Cleveland-Philly. Maybe the ding-dang-dung was a precursor to the end of the mariners season…
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It looks like Philly magic now!
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too bad about Seattle.
Philly sports are firing on all cylinders right now, and I think the Phillies now have a decent shot at making the World Series.
I’m also rooting for Cleveland over the Yanks…
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Cleveland almost did it!
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Wish that all my visits at the dentist over the decades could have been via a Zoom meeting instead of sitting in that dang chair with the spit bowl…
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Dentists do not have me in life or death situations but I fear them more than other medical practitioners!
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Where I live, the Covid bus comes to you, but I’m in a remote rural area. It will be here in a month or so, parked two blocks away. Your mention of the airports of olden days — yeah, it was a big deal to have your birthday at the airport where you got a cupcake with a sparkler in it and a Shirley Temple while you watched the DC-6es land and take off.
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Yes, airports had a good vibe! But we have to be old to remember that!
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That’s OK. I am old. For me the big points are that I’m here, pretty healthy, ambulatory, mostly in my right mind (as far as I can tell) and have great dogs. π
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And you have the good judgment to appreciate those circumstances!
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“Zooming a dentist…” You crack me up. I need to see a dentist, but have been postponing it right now.
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It never takes much of an excuse to avoid making a dental appointment!
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So true
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Zooming a dentist is a thing! Orthodontists now ask patients to take photos of their braces using a βscan boxβ in lieu of follow ups. This definitely a new kind of phone box.
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I guess I should not be surprised by that. My funeral and wake will probably be scheduled on Zoom.
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Love that! I wish my dentist would “get with the times” … π
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You are hilarious! Plus you are always up to mischief (in the mind or physically or both)! I think if there there were no covid curbs, you will be out there having loads of fun!
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Sometimes I feel guilty having so much fun!
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ππ€£
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My long-time barber retired. I had to find a replacement, and was looking for another place to not just get a haircut but bond with. My new hair-stylist…The Grumpy Barber. (no, I am not making that up) I do use an app to schedule my appointment, but we talk sports the whole time and it’s a good time. I lucked out. I don’t like hair in my soup either, so we do have that in common.
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It comes as no surprise that you would be talking sports with your barber!
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ππ
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I remember, years ago, as a young(er) girl, going to my regular hairdresser. My parents dropped me off, and when I set off to pay, I realized I forgot my purse in their car. My regular hairdresser not only told me to pay “next time”, but also lent me money to get back home… I kind of miss that feel…
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Great example, Endless Weekend!
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Yeah, I miss the days of taking ‘shrooms under the stars of Lake Powell and scribbling my “brilliant” thoughts in the sand, next to my sleeping bag, so I would remember them in the morning. Their brilliance faded under the morning sun, unfortunately. Oh, but this post wasn’t really about that, was it.
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Yeah, it was kind of about that!
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I knew I was in trouble when I had a ZOOM appointment with my doctor during COVID, and he asked me if I could show him where the pain in my back was. Have you seriously tried holding a laptop behind your butt with one hand while trying to point to the spot with the other?
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And I seriously hope I never have to try that, although a film of that would likely go viral on social media!
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Your use of paragraphs is really throwing me off, but so glad to be reading your humor again!
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Yeah, I have been going back and forth on the idea of using paragraphs or not. Variety is good, like experimenting with different forms of poetry.
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I strolled along to the Pavillion theatre in town with two simple aims. You used to be able to saunter into the foyer, in all its red velvet gorgeousness, browse the what’s on leaflets and collect those that appealed. You could also go to the box office window and talk to a human being and buy paper tickets that would be passed under the window to you. The whole building was locked up and when I got home and looked up their website it was equally unfriendly with little clue as to what was on or how to get tickets, only exhortations to avoid contact with their staff.
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Yes, I miss some of those simpler and friendlier times.
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Smuggling books into Amazon Corporate Headquarters could be a good plot for an animated movie. Just an idea…
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As usual, you are right!
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Sadly, I have to order most of my books online. Because A) I canβt get the English books I want here and B) I also canβt get my Austrian authors here. But throw me into WH Smith or Waterstones and I could spend hours in there. Coming back with bags of books from my βto buyβ list – just to have to pay the overweight charge for my suitcase full of books on my return. I love bookstores. And I love books. Plain and simple. I totally agree with you that some things from βback thenβ are just missed.
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I usually want to have my cake and eat it too!
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you have a great way of helping us laugh at sad things – I miss bookstores too…
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I don’t mind when some things go obsolete like developing film. But bookstores were so wonderful.
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definitely – tho have to admit that for as much as I love them, I also enjoyed since late 90s that amazon offered books I ordinarily couldnβt find via other methodsβ¦ (much as I have love/hate with amazon)
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Yes l too ‘am grateful every day I awake up alive’ because if l woke up dead l fear l may be told off for not asking permission to have done so!
I would hate to be stuck in the online queue to have unpermissioned decisions reversed!
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“Unpermissioned” is such a wonderful word you have introduced me too!
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Yes it has a ring to its nonsensical value l feel π
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I hear you Geoff! I personally think online appointment system especially to meet Dr is no meaning. I’d never get to complete app without seeing receptionist (sometimes they need to give me wrist band) and see Dr on timeπ
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I feel like all the hoops I have to jump through to get a doctor’s appointment are just part of my screening for dementia.
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πππ
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Haha… well, Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang…
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To my surprise, WP says Iβm not following you. So I pressed βfollowβ again. (Sigh… the horror & sadistic terror of WordPress). π³
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Yep, I hate when that happens, although in my case there is a good chance I caused whatever glitch erupted because I am a technology dinosaur.
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π¦ π¦ π¦
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It’s not too bad getting in to see a doctor here BUT they always send you for lab tests and getting in there is a technical nightmare. We can get into Wendy’s without an online reservation but since I can’t figure out their high tech drink machine, it is kind of pointless. π§
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Ha, yes, the fun of an expedition to a restaurant evaporates when I have to show off how incompetent I am!
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Since Covid, half the restaurants here have apps to order from on your phone instead of paper menus. It’s like a test to see if you are sharp enough to eat there.
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There’s a line in the Movie Under the Tuscan Sun that leapt to my mind when the reading of your 3 D’s. Should you like, perhaps you will Seek & Find it in your own viewing of this quaint movie…no reservation needed. π
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Thanks for the tip.
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Thank goodness local restaurants will still pick up the phone to handle a take-out order after I have fouled up the process through their online app. And now that you mention it, I cannot decide which is worse – a long hair in your soup or soup in your long hair. I wonder if that is where the expression “chowderhead” comes from.
Also, I started collecting those cast iron things that keep big stuff from going into the storm sewers. But they are so big and heavy that I don’t have room for any more of them. You could say that I’m grateful (for being grate full).
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Soup in long hair is worse. With hair in soup, you just throw out the soup! Humans are collectors, so I bet somewhere somebody is collecting sewer grates.π
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