Spelling Algorithm

~ Geoff Stamper

One more thing I hate about myself is how I misspell words so badly that the autocorrect cannot even come up with a suggestion or it recommends some other word entirely. I always thought I was a good speller, not as good as the prodigy Jim Borden, but Spelling was my best subject in elementary school. What a sinking feeling to discover that Spelling class was not part of the high school curriculum. My grade point average took a nosedive. The word algorithm can only be misspelled so many ways. I have to go to Google where they try a little harder to guess what I am trying to spell. I always hated dictionaries because if you want to look up how to spell a word, you have to know how to spell it to find it. I think we need a spelling dictionary with all known misspellings and spellings in alphabetical order. The misspellings would have the correct spelling in parenthesis followed by a short definition. This would make for a very large printed dictionary but no one uses those anyway. So it would be online where space seems to be infinite. I think my idea could get bipartisan support because I cannot figure out how either political party could get into lockstep entrenchment on this issue.

48 thoughts on “Spelling Algorithm”

  2. Learn to spell good well
    The only resource that answers both these questions is The McGraw-Hill Dictionary of Misspelled and Easily Confused Words. It’s the only book that includes commonly (here you go, this is real)

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  3. There are lots of words that I can never remember how to spell. Especially the ones with the ‘ie’ or ‘ei’. Never get those right. I think incorrect spellings deserve more respect than they get. Haha! Good one, Geoff. 🙂

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  4. The last bit is easy. One side would be unable to decide if hukt awn foniks was dialectic, and therefore acceptable or if was a culturally embedded intellectual slur. The other side would counter with the rules are the same for everyone and playing is not a matter of choice, gender or race and without rules we’d end up with Tower of Babel anarchy. In the end no one would be able to read the others’ documents, they would all take to the streets, blame the spelling Nazis while they burned cities and sued somebody.
    This boy is the silent P in fishing. This girl the missing E in query. Beware of them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased.”

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  6. Easy there, Geoff. The Republicans will claim it is an attempt by government to subtly influence people to depend on the socialists for correct spelling and the Democrats will claim the Republicans are trying to suppress how to spell the word, “vote.” 😏

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  10. the ability to spell words correctly has gotten me far in life, as I sit here drinking a Coors and looking at my measly WordPress stats. If only I had spent that time learning how to program, I could have come up with Facebook long before Zuckerberg did. Oh well, who knew that spell check would come along and steal my thunder…

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  11. Lordy, I’ve slipped a long way from good first grades too. Spelling B’s now D+ at best. There are words that consistantly- dammit, consistently trip me up. When I write, strait- dammit- straight from the beginning I’m wrong. I write ‘begining’ every time because two nn’s does not look wri- dammit- right no matter how many times I begin. Sigh.

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  12. I have always taken pride in being able to spell but you, of all people, should know better than to underestimate politicians of any brand. If I remember correctly (which is just as unlikely as not) spelling words the same way every time only came into being in the 18th century.

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  14. I can pretty much guarantee the opposing party (whichever one it is) will have a problem with it because they didn’t suggest it. Of course, if they did, the other party would tell them what a terrible idea it was. Bipartisanship at work—I’m sure this wasn’t what our forefathers had in mind. I wonder if they were excellent spellers? I think Borden’s in the Spelling Hall of Fame. Can cal Ripken say that???

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  15. In school (a looooooog time ago), I made straight A’s in spelling. Now, like you, I sometimes have to resort to a Google search to get the correct spelling of a word. I have a dictionary app on my phone that I can speak the word to, and it’s supposed to bring it up, but half the time, it doesn’t understand me. Maybe because of my strong Southern accent? Who knows what’s going on there. Maybe Siri doesn’t like Southerners and wants to make things difficult for me… all these red states, you know. 🙂

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    1. I do have trouble understanding strong accents. When I was 20, driving through the South was so difficult. When I asked for directions, I could not understand the answer although technically we were both speaking the same language.

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      1. I completely understand. A few years ago, I was on a business call with a woman from Brooklyn, New York. We both had to constantly ask each other to repeat what we said. We both had a good laugh about it.

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  17. I am a relatively competent speller but that did not stop my work computer from offering bizarre suggestions. I would type ‘stainless steel’ and my computer would say “Did you mean black licorice?” Uh, no?? 🙄

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  18. I thought I was a good speller in grade school until the spelling bee. Who could have imagined that “debris” ended with an “s”.

    Around that same time I learned that my local telephone book contained a multiple listings for itself, one of which was under F for “Fone Company”. I phound that hilarious.

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