Making Stuff Up

J-Dub clued me in that MSU was an acronym for Makes Stuff Up. This cleared up one of the biggest misunderstandings of my life. I thought my dentist was asking me for a Midstream Specimen of Urine (also MSU). Apparently she was actually accusing me of making stuff up, specifically my assertion that I floss three times a day, when she scribbled the MSU designation on my file. I can understand now why I was banned from her office after leaving my specimen in a glass in the patient restroom. Yesterday I tried to explain the mix-up on her answering machine. I left several messages. But it was too soon to laugh about my mistake because she is now filing for a formal restraining order. I do admit that I made up the claim of flossing three times a day. I only did a triple floss that one day when I ate the squirrel I caught stealing birdseed in the neighbor’s backyard. I may have stretched the facts past the letter of the law but feel I still captured the spirit of my relationship with the dentist. She has always given me physical pain and drained my bank account just because I use my teeth to eat, open packages, and sharpen pencils.