Ventriloquism

The latest video phone call from my 13 year old granddaughter centered around a new skill she has been practicing. She inhales air to puff up her cheeks and closes her mouth tightly. Then she says over and over like a ventriloquist: “I’m stuck and can’t get out.” This is an appropriate international slogan during Covid-19 times. My granddaughter’s performance is impressive but I am not sure she should be calling us during remote learning school hours. I worry about whether she can make a career out of being a ventriloquist, although she probably got the idea from some wealthy Youtuber with a zillion followers. I encourage her to perform the routine 10,000 times because that is the formula for getting good at anything. I learned the 10,000 repetition requirement late in life and so remain good for nothing. One thing I noticed was that each of the other four people on our end of the line immediately tried performing the same ventriloquism trick for themselves. That is the natural human instinct. So I hope the next call will not feature my granddaughter balancing a bucket of manure on her head. But just in case, I asked my wife how we could acquire a bucket of the stuff. You know how people sometimes stare at you and then just walk away without answering your question? Well my wife has done it about 10,000 times, so she is getting good at it. But I am starting to think something is wrong with her.