Fourth Grade Election

Fourth Grade is the first time students are allowed to run for Student Council at my granddaughter Zofia’s elementary school. Her class elected one boy and one girl. As near as I can tell, almost every student ran for the office. Since they all vote for themselves, the boys end up electing the girl representative and the girls determine which boy goes to Student Council. This is likely an unintended consequence of the overarching plan to have both genders equally represented. The election is a clever exercise where candidates write a two paragraph speech and deliver it in front of the class. They are doing schoolwork without realizing it. My daughter-in-law told me to stay out of the process even though I fed Zofia’s father several celebrated lines in his successful student elections. Some of my quips were censored in the approval process but I like to take too much credit for the opener in his speech for Student Body President: “I want to represent the best high school in the state of Kansas [pause for cheers], but since I cannot do that, I want to represent you!” Zofia wrote an excellent speech on her own although generally parents were involved for good and bad reasons. One girl was promising a Fidget Spinner to everyone who voted for her until her parents scrubbed that from her speech. Apparently the seeds of election corruption spring up organically. The election results were cleverly revealed right before Friday dismissal. Zofia shed tears. She lost and did not even get a Fidget Spinner. It might have been worse if one of her closest friends won. Apparently the system worked because if Zofia had not voted for herself, she said she would have voted for Stella, the ultimate winner.

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